I don’t know if it’s because it’s late night, or if it’s due to the fact that I’m listening the Kooks, but I’m in the mood to share some poetic words pertaining to love. My reason for writer’s block is due to my focus on my love life. & Now that i’ve kind of started something that’s serious, don’t mind me if my mind wanders back to thoughts of my current crush.
From experience and lessons in life, I’ve learned a lot of new things about myself and love. See, you can have love. If that’s what you want. But the first thing that you should know is yourself. And when you are honest with yourself, then everything falls into place. I’ve been single for a little over 6 months now, and I did not expect for any man to sweep me off my feet at this moment. When I did meet him, I was fully confident in myself and I wore my life with a smile on my face and love within myself. There were two different single phases that I went through and depending on who you want to be at the moment, that specific personality will attract that serious/non-serious guy. And it’s up to you to figure out who you want to be. Here’s more of details of the two single Daisy’s and where I ended up today..
THE TWO SINGLE DAISY’S
1. Party Girl- When you’re single, it seems as if your fridays have become occupied with the following options; partying, dating, or alone at home. In the beginning of self discovery, I tried out the bachelorette Daisy on for size. I dated platonically, partied till the AM and I lived in the Now. I thought about no future with anyone. What did I look for in a guy? In brutal honesty, Physical looks, a good sense of social communicating, and money. I’m not going to lie, I was pretty shallow. I wasn’t looking for anything serious, so why even deal with anything else serious right? I enjoyed having a good time at a lounge with a cocktail in hand, with a pretty dress on, and looking good next to THEE man of the hour. It was an ego booster, and the majority of the time, I had a good time partying. But then when I went home, the lifestyle still wasn’t fulfilling my happiness. Some girls may appreciate being the arm candy of a powerful man, or popping champagne at the VIP table of Vegas’s hottest club, or get wine and dined on a weekend getaway, but that just wasn’t me. I got what I asked for. Shallow relationships that went nowhere. I knew this wasn’t what I wanted my life to be…
2. Seriously though- So I went the other route. I chose to focus on my writing, and to unclutter my love life by removing numbers and rejecting calls/texts. I wasn’t going to entertain that lifestyle anymore. And when I did go out, I went out with my girlfriends or Lulu with a purpose; to get a story for my writings. And when I started getting used to being alone, without superficiality but finding my real self; I guess things started to fall in place. That night when I met him, I was celebrating my girl’s bday, with no expectation of getting with anyone. I just wanted to have fun and dance. Unexpectedly, things were flowing and here we are…
What I am trying to say is that whatever you want, you can have. Whether it be serious or for fun, make sure you’re happy with whatever you choose. Don’t lose hope for anything. Things fall into place when you’re true to yourself. Don’t wait. Just do it.-D
